The Violence has to stop by Marcia Dixon

Almost every day I hear a story, an anecdote or have a conversation with or about someone who has experienced domestic violence.  Invariably, the person who has suffered the violence and abuse is a woman.   Shockingly, the perpetrator is often a so-called CHRISTIAN man.  What on earth is going on?

Has the Church’s teaching about submission given some men license to treat women any way they choose, even it if means abusing them physically, and in some harrowing cases causing them to lose their child? Or is it that too many Christian men are walking around with unchallenged, misogynistic attitudes about women, attitudes which they feel are supported by their biblical beliefs?

Whatever the reasons, it is plain wrong.  No woman should be subjected to domestic violence, let alone from a man who proclaims to be a follower of Christ.

It’s high time for churches to take domestic violence seriously – not only in providing the necessary support to women, who are usually the victims of it, but also in helping men to confront and deal with their desire to control and exert power over women, which includes the use of violent behaviour.

Women’s ministries within our churches have played a major role in teaching, mentoring, supporting and inspiring Christian women to be better people.  It’s now time for men’s ministries to step up to the plate to not only help men be more effective Christians, but to teach them – unequivocally – that domestic violence and abuse of women is not compatible with the Christian lifestyle.

One thought on “The Violence has to stop by Marcia Dixon

  • 29th November 2020 at 11:37 am

    It has always concerned me when I hear about domestic abuse carried out by Christian men. I just cannot understand how they feel in their standing with God, and Christ who is our example. Indeed men’s ministries must address this unChristlike behaviour. It has to be dealt with from a psychological, sociological, and generational perspective.

    It requires deep and uncomfortable conversations to bring out such matters as childhood experiences, their experience of parenting, the home environment in which they grew up, their neighborhoods, their friends; their experiences at school and at work, their position among their siblings, where they lived, and how they felt about where they lived. Their parents’ jobs/careers/professions and how they felt about that. Who they felt themselves to be.

    Unfortunately, many Black-led Churches skimmed over these issues, some because they don’t recognise that these are issues the Church should handle, others feel that prayer and faith without practical work will resolve it all.

    One of the interesting things about this is many Ministers have studied psychology as part of their ministerial training, but are reluctant to practice it, for whatever reason. Furthermore, there are professionals in the Church who are qualified in many of the areas mentioned above, yet their services are not called upon within the Church.

    Until there is recognition of abuse within the senior hierarchy within Black-led Churches, the problem will remain unresolved and women will continue to suffer the abuse from men who cannot connect or reconcile their positions as Christian and how this should play the most significant role in their relationship with their spouse.


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