By: Gabriel Agbo
Yes, we will not see her again on this side of eternity, but her piercing, anointed, generational voice and the ripples of the revelations coming out of her marriage experience will still be with us for a long time to come. The painful and untimely passing of one of the Nigeria’s leading Christian worship leaders/musicians Osinachi Nwachukwu has brought mourning to many hearts and also turned the searchlight once again to the increasing incidents of domestic violence and abuse in our society. We were initially told that she died from a battle with throat cancer, but from the stories that are trending now, it’s like she was also going through very deep and protracted domestic issues. We are hearing that the husband mentally, physically, and financially tortured her. The relations and friends have said so. The minister for women affairs and others were also reported to have spoken with her kids while visiting her home. We have also read that the police arrested and is currently investigating the man. Sure, no victim of domestic violence has attracted so much attention in this part of the world. No doubt the death of this fast-rising and anointed talent is an irreparable loss to this generation, the church, the nation, and the world. I have personally been in a mourning mode since I got the news. It is still shocking that such angelic, genuine and terrific worship was coming out of a pained and traumatized heart. I can now see that she was using all her strength to cry out for a rescue, but unfortunately, we did not decode the message in her voice, tears, and look. But why did heaven allow this to happen? Tell me.
There are so many questions over this avoidable loss. Why would a man, a human being treat a wife or even another person that way (that is if what we are hearing is true)? Sorry, I added that caveat because most of us are still confused about what actually killed the woman. Was it the throat cancer as initially reported or the beating of the man as we later heard? This must be made clear. Have an autopsy been conducted? If not, please those concerned should do so immediately and release the result to the public. Her case is no more private. Nigerians, government, NGOs, the church, her colleagues, and fans all over the world are interested. I think I also read it was mentioned in the senate or by one of the leaders. Facts must be properly verified before any conclusion or vilification. What was the immediate cause of Osinachi’s death?? Did the relations, husband, church do everything within their power to save her? We must not rush into any conclusion or be carried away by emotions now. We want the facts from the experts and nothing but the facts. That will help to cool the nerves and console the grieving hearts. Then, why was she going through all these and the ministers and associates were not able to pick the signals and help her on time? Are we sure we showed her enough love or were we just exploited her gifts and service? Ministers, friends must look beyond the gifts and services to see what is going around and in the life of the gifted. Look into the spirit of your members, look at their faces. See their pains, their needs, hunger, and their fears and not just their numbers, resources, and talents. Release the time and the resources back to the people. I am still shocked that a worship leader of Osinachi’s statue was going through all that and her pastor didn’t know. Your worship leader is always like your close daughter in any ministry – a priceless asset. In fact, they help to grow the church. Most people come to church to enjoy good worship and praise sections.
I also want to blame our late sister, if what we are reading is true. Why did she remain in that hell called home without crying out? She had access to many other great, genuine ministers that could have also helped her. She did not have to die that way. I do not support careless divorce, but you can separate at extreme cases, at least to see if things can be repaired before you continue. It is better and cheaper to be alive. When you die prematurely, you lose everything and your kids will suffer and float for as long as the grace will carry them. I am a victim of this and I don’t wish any child such experience. And it is not just about men because some women also mentally, emotionally, physically, and spiritually abuse their husbands and children. The things we are hearing are the extreme form of slavery. I don’t have a problem with husbands and wives managing their resource together, but it must be done in love, faithfulness and the resources must also be evenly used to take care of every member of the family. It is gross wickedness, satanic for somebody to produce and you deny them the benefit and joy of their efforts. Finance, lack of respect, lack of commitment, and unfaithfulness are behind most of the marital issues we are having today. There is always a struggle over these and you are safe not to pass judgments until you know the genesis of the matter. Marriage is work and commitment. I wish our dear sister is alive today to tell her own side of the story. It could be deeper or shallower than we are hearing. Peter and Osinachi Nwachukwu would have ruled the world. Maybe, she would have also told us to leave and pray for her husband, that he would eventually change. That was what she kept telling her relations and friends till the end. Yes, she was indeed a true Christian, but just needed a little information and courage to avert this avoidable sad end. The man just mismanaged what most men are looking for. Just imagine that angel in the hand of a loving, committed, and caring husband or even in the hands of a very loving, powerful minister of the gospel. Imagine that lady singing before or after you powerful preaching. Yes, they would have indeed ruled the world.
Now, that oil has spilled, it is not time to keep shading tears and looking for a way to punish her husband. We must urgently put in place the mechanism to draw out and help those that are going through the same level of abuse. Note that I said level of abuse, because we must not encourage people to walk out of their marriages at the slightest misunderstanding or conflict. No! There is no marriage, partnership without conflict. But if you cannot handle the situation please speak out. Talk to your family. Talk to your pastor and mentors. Talk to genuine marriage counselors. And also pray and work on yourselves. The problem may even be from you and you are busy blaming others. Also be careful how you swallow the advices of these many unmarriable marriage counselors who are against marriage institution. Yes, some people are indeed unmarriable and they may not be qualified to advise others. You cannot give what you don’t have. Be careful! Marriage is divine, desirable, sweet, and can be honorable and enjoyable. Marriages are increasingly suffering and crashing today because this generation does not appreciate divine love, faithfulness, submission, and commitment. The bible said that men should love their wives as Christ loves them and women must submit to their husbands as the head of the family. But this generation does want to hear all of that. If you ignore the word of God, you suffer. We also want to ask the Nigerian government, her church, and fans to think of immediately establishing a foundation in her name that will fight for other women (and men) who are abused, take care of her children’s well-being and education, and her beautiful works. It will also be good for the government, woman affairs ministry, and the Dunamis church to immortalize this rare gem, visiting angel, by naming monuments after her. Pastor Enenche, please take note. We must not stop visiting her home, interviewing her kids, shedding tears, or looking for a scapegoat to jail or punish. She was just like that angel that periodically came to stir the pool at Bethesda. They come once in a while. Good night Sister Osinachi!
Written By: Gabriel Agbo