Managing change in a world that constantly changes
Shirley Anstis reminds us that change within ourselves and the wider world is inevitable and provides some tools and insights to manage both
As the seasons change, and the days seem longer, we step into another phase of life. Change gives us an opportunity to transform and grow. Whether positive or negative, change is inevitable.
We’re still in the early months of the year, so there’s still time to consider your hopes and plans for 2025. What would you like in this next chapter of your life? Is there anything from 2024 that you want more of, or less of? Was there something missing in 2024 that you would like to add to 2025? This is an opportunity to invite positive change.
The year could bring changes we desire – and other life events could force changes we do not want. Often being proactive is better than sticking our heads in the sand and then being jolted into a reaction. By being mindfully present in our lives, we can respond to what is real rather than focus on our regrets or worries. Whatever the case, know that change is often difficult, so be gentle with yourself and practise self-care.
Life takes us on a developmental journey from childhood to old age. At each stage of life, there is an opportunity to expand our world by adding new ideas and experiences. This expanded perspective can bring more joy into our world. By adding more into our life bucket, we crowd out the joyless activities and significantly reduce the proportion of our world they take up.
We can try to keep our world tightly closed and unchanged although this is near impossible. Life has a way of forcing us to make changes and our resistance often makes this a harder and longer process. Whether we’re losing a relationship or losing our health, early recognition and action stem the loss, helping to preserve what is left.
When we experience loss or hurt, we may want to shrink our world so that we can feel safe or have control. This receding is often ineffective. It may be better to face the loss and work through the many stages of grief: denial, anger, bargaining, depression and acceptance. For all of us, the recent pandemic changed our world forever and we need to make sense of that. This is best done with support – free or paid.
Once we’ve achieved some form of acceptance, we might be able to consider what changes could be helpful. Years later, we may be able to look back and recognise the many lessons learned and insights gained. I know the sad and sudden death of my sister many years ago gave me the courage to publish my first book.
Whether you are embarking on changing your thoughts, changing your brain, changing your emotions, or changing how you experience your body, becoming more self-aware is a good place to start. Any approach that encourages you to look after yourself and improve your well-being is divine work. Having faith in something greater could support you connecting to your soul and embracing transformation.
The world continues to go through turbulence. We can either deny the reality of change or find a way to work with it. If and when we accept the reality of it, we can still pledge to push against it, in whatever way we can. Sometimes change can feel like a death. Who will we become, without ‘that thing’ that feels so much a part of us?
You may be one of those people who feels stuck in a rut and would love to make changes to your life but aren’t sure where to start. Perhaps you want to be healthier, fitter, braver or more energetic. Or maybe that’s just my hope for 2025. You just need to start wherever you are.
You may have well-meaning contacts who encourage you to stay as you are. They may fear losing you or being left behind. You will need to find the courage to make desired changes. If there is no one in your network who can support you, then I’d suggest finding a counsellor or coach who can support you in your desire for more or different.
Best of luck in dealing with the changes that 2025 will bring.
SHIRLEY ANSTIS
Counsellor, transformational coach, and author
www.envisioncounselling.co.uk
